Jokes/Articles
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By Nagin J Jagada
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(IN THE ABOVE TOP PHOTO NAGIN JAGADA IS GIVING TALK)

A)JOKES
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1. One day I was answering one of my friend who asked me where you born.
I replied Gujarat..
My friend asked; oh! really, which part?
I replied; all of me, silly.

2. Myself and my American friend were walking outside.
My friend said " Oh look ! At this dead bird "
I looked towards sky and said," where? where?

3. One day I see lot of guys are running on the highway. I asked bystander as to why are the guys are running, what they are doing?
Bystander replied, " A Merathon race is going on.
I asked, " What do they get from that?
Bystander; The winner get the prize.
I asked, " Then why are the others running?

4.One day I rushed back angrily to the grocerry shop from where I had purchased a packet of butter a few minutes ago
"Where is my free gift?" I shouted at the shopkeeper.
"But Sir, there is no free gift on the purchase of butter." The shopkeeper answered politely.
"Don't fool me," I replied "it is clearly written on the packet of the butter 'Cholesterol free'".

5.One day I was at home and went to the kitchen, opened the Sugar bottle, peeped inside and closed it. my wife was seeing this. After some time I went to the kitchen, opened the Sugar Bottle, peeped inside and closed it. My wife again saw this. I did again and again the same thing. My wife was puzzled at why did I do something like this. So, she asked me, 'Why did you open the Sugar bottle, see inside and close it often?'
I replied, 'I am a Sugar Patient you know.... My doctor advised me to check up the Sugar often'.

6.One day I asked Nurse, I am very eager to know my blood group. Nurse: B positive
Myself: please tell me soon ...
Nurse: B positive
Myself: Madam, I am positive, but eager to know my blood group.

6.Q: Why did you take a pair of binoculars with him to a funeral?
A: It was a distant relative's funeral.


KEEP SMILING - One size fits all.
HELP EVER - HURT NEVER
BE HAPPY
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B)PURE DHAMMA
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1. From right understanding, proceeds right thought

2. From right thought, proceeds right speech

3. From right speech, proceeds right action

4. From right action, proceeds right livelihood

5. From right livelhood, proceeds right efforts

6. From right efforts, proceeds right awarenes

7. From right awareness, proceeds right concentration

8. From right concentration, proceeds right wisdom

9. From right wisdom, proceeds libration from suffering


MAY WHAT YOU READ HERE GIVE INCOURAGEMENT
AND DIRECTION TO YOUR OWN SEARCH FOR
HAPPINESS AND TRUTH = MAY EVERY READER
FIND HIS HER OWN PATH TO GROW FOR HAPPINESS
AND PEACE.
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C)BANANAS AND ITS BENEFITS(HEALTHCARE HINTS)
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Bananas Containing three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and glucose combined withfiber, a banana gives an instant, sustained andsubstantial boost of energy. Research has proventhat just two bananas provide enough energy fora strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder thebanana is the number one fruit with the world'sleading athletes. But energy isn't the only waya banana can help us keep fit. It can also helpovercome or prevent a substantial number ofillnesses and conditions, making it a must toadd to our daily diet. Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MINDamongst people suffering from depression, manyfelt much better after eating a banana. Thisis because bananas contain tryptophan, a type ofprotein that the body converts into serotonin,known to make you relax, improve your mood andgenerally make you feel happier. PMS: Forget the pills -- eat a banana. The vitamin B6it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.
Anemia: High in iron, bananas can stimulate theproduction of hemoglobin in the blood and sohelps in cases of anemia.
Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high inpotassium yet low in salt, making it the perfectway to beat blood pressure. So much so, the USFood and Drug Administration has just allowedthe banana industry to make official claims forthe fruit's ability to reduce the risk of bloodpressure and stroke. Brain Power: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) schoolwere helped through their exams this year byeating bananas at breakfast, break, and lunch ina bid to boost their brain power. Research hasshown that the potassium-packed fruit can assistlearning by making pupils more alert.
Constipation: High in fiber, including bananas in the diet canhelp restore normal bowel action, helping toovercome the problem without resorting tolaxatives.
Hangovers: One of the quickest ways of curing a hangover isto make a banana milkshake, sweetened withhoney. The banana calms the stomach and, with thehelp of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes andre-hydrates your system.
Heartburn: Bananas have a natural antacid effect in thebody, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eatinga banana for soothing relief.
Morning Sickness: Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keepblood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.
Mosquito bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, tryrubbing the affected area with the inside of abanana skin. Many people find it amazinglysuccessful at reducing swelling and irritation. Nerves: Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.Overweight and at work? Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austriafound pressure at work leads to gorging oncomfort food like chocolate and chips. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found themost obese were more likely to be inhigh-pressure jobs. The report concluded that,to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need tocontrol our blood sugar levels by snacking onhigh carbohydrate foods every two hours to keeplevels steady.
Ulcers: The banana is used as the dietary food againstintestinal disorders because of its soft textureand smoothness. It is the only raw fruit thatcan be eaten without distress in over-chroniclercases. It also neutralizes over-acidity andreduces irritation by coating the lining of thestomach. Temperature control: Many other cultures see bananas as a "cooling"fruit that can lower both the physical andemotional temperature of expectant mothers. InThailand, for example, pregnant women eatbananas to ensure their baby is born with a cooltemperature.
Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Bananas can help SAD sufferers because theycontain the natural mood enhancer tryptophan. Smoking: Bananas can also help people trying to give upsmoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well asthe potassium and magnesium found in them, helpthe body recover from the effects of nicotinewithdrawal.
Stress: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helpsnormalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to thebrain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises,thereby reducing our potassium levels. These canbe rebalanced with the help of a high-potassiumbanana snack.
Strokes: According to research in "The New EnglandJournal of Medicine," eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death bystrokes by as much as 40%! So, a banana really is a natural remedy for manyills. When you compare it to an apple, it hasfour times the protein, twice the carbohydrates,three times the phosphorus, five times thevitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitaminsand minerals. It is also rich in potassium andis one of the best value foods around. So maybeits time to change that well-known phrase sothat we say, "A banana a day keeps the doctoraway!"--------
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D)WHAT WE KNOW (Health Care hints for Blood Pressure)
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1. Most common problem for which people go to
the doctors in the United States: HIGH BLOOD
PRESSURE

2. Ideal blood pressure: 110/70 or less
(without medication)

3. Average blood pressure of vegetarians:
112/69

4. Average blood pressure of non-vegetarians:
121/77

5. Definition of high blood pressure: The top
number(systolic) is consistently over 140,or the
bottom number(diastolic) over 90,while the person
is at rest.

6. Incidence of high blood pressure in meat
eaters compared to vegetarians: Nearly triple

7. Incidence of very high blood pressure in
meat eaters compared to vegetarians: 13 times
higher

8. Patients with high blood pressure who achive
substantial improvement by switchig to a
vegetarian diet: 30-75 percent.

9. What patients are typically told when
prescribed medications for high blood pressure:"
You'll probably need to take these for the rest
of your life"

10. Patients with high blood pressure who are
able to completely discontinue use of medications
after adopting a low-sodium,low-fat,high-fiber
vegetarian diet: 58 percent

11. Incidence of high blood pressure among
senior citizens in United States: More than 50
percent

12. Incidence of high blood pressure among
senior citizens in countries eating traditional
low-fat plant based diets: Virtually none.

Is That So?

" Blood pressure fell within hours of starting
the (very low-fat vegan diet) Mcdougall program.
Twenty percent of the people were on blood
pressure medications the day they began the
program.In almost every case the medication were
stopped that day.Yet the blood pressure
dropped(significantly) by the second day. this
data is from over 1,000 participants at the
Mcdougall program at St.Helena Hospital in the
Napa Valley of California"
- John Mcdougall,M.D.
Sources;From the book "Food revolution" (How your
diet can help save your life and world)
By; john Robbins Author of Diet for New
America.BEST SELLER BOOK.
I request you all to go this website for lot of
very useful information about health and food.
www.drmcdougall.com
MAY EVERY READER FIND HIS OR HER PATH AND GROW IN
HAPPINESS AND PEACE.
HELP EVER - HURT NEVER
BE HAPPY
E)THE COORDINATION OF MIND AND BODY FOR GOOD HEALTH
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Almost everyone who has high stress and mental problems can benefit from meditation. 70-80% of people who have physical health problems can benefit from meditation. In this age, meditation is more important than medication. There is ongoing research on meditation and its effects being done in various places in India like Lonavala, Kurushetra, Delhi, Jaipur and Tirupati. Research results in Jaipur indicate that meditation has benefited 60% of diabetes cases, 30% of asthma cases, and 70% of patients suffering from diseases related to kidneys and intestines. So many people today are suffering from stress, hypertension and depression. In most cases, the root causes are quite small, but people tend to blow it out of proportion, which leads to more suffering. Through meditation, these causes can be minimized again. In order to be freed from worry, mankind today needs meditation more than medicines and doctors.

Meditation means the mind is completely free from thought and is in pure awareness. Thoughts are always ongoing; if not, then they cannot be alive. For mental purity, silence and meditation is required. Sleep can give the body some rest, but it gives little rest to the mind. Mental rest is not possible without meditation.

As most of the food we eat is non-essential to the body, similarly a majority of the thoughts are non-essential to the mind. Just like we must have some gap between meals, it is necessary to have some gap between thoughts. Many of the thoughts are harmful to us. As our physical health is adversely affected by junk food, similarly negative thought and over-thinking adversely affects our mental health, due to which we get short-tempered. Just like eating foods that aren’t very good or healthy easily becomes a habit, which basically means we are walking trash-bins; similarly thinking negative thoughts and over-thinking becomes a habit that causes our heads to be filled with trash too, thus leading to stress and depression.

Whether trash is in the body or in the head, we are not giving it up easily. Just like fasting is essential to the body, mental fasting is also required by the mind. This is known as meditation. Human beings are like icebergs. Only 1/6th of an iceberg is visible on the surface of the water while 84% of it is submerged. Similarly only 16% of our self is visible externally, while the rest is inside us. It is our misfortune that we are focusing on the part that is visible while ignoring the rest. We are spending a lot of money on illnesses pertaining to the body, and are not thinking of the core issues.

We have a duty to our body to take care of it and if we do not fulfill this we get sick. Similarly we have a duty to our mind and if we do not fulfill it, the mind also becomes sick. The instrument to take care of the mind is meditation. Here I’d like to mention the words of Bhagvan Buddha who says that health means freedom of physical and mental illnesses. He always said that he is a physician, not a philosopher. This is why Buddha gave us a wonderful path, he thought about how to purify the mind, not just at the surface level but deep inside at the root level.



Mental health means one should have the following:

One should be able to recover quickly from a problem
One should be able to know proper circumstances and know himself
Love in life, kindness to everybody and mercy
Capable of finding productive work and obtaining pleasure from it
Satisfaction of hunger, thirst and vasna without harming anybody
Good character


Why would anyone want to meditate?
We know how to go inside our hearts and minds for real to find out who we are
We learn that peace is inside us and how to find it
To strengthen the mind
Heighten our powers of concentration
Discover fresh resources of energy
Become more available to other people and useful to society
Learn a practical way of overcoming the storms and stress of our daily lives
Stop creating pain to ourselves and off-loading our distress onto others
Learn how to develop and share selfless love and compassion
Learn how to detoxify the mind, become more positive, less reactive, more understanding, more giving and less self-centered
Start to take control to enrich our lives, to change ourselves for the better

MIND
The Body operates by 10 principal components in two divisions :
Five Gnan Indriya – Organs of perception: Eyes, Ears, Nose, Tongue & Skin.
Five Karma Indriya – Organs of action: Hands, Feet, Organ of evacuation,
Organ of procreation and the Tongue -which plays a dual role of Speech and - intake for Food.

Interaction of the body takes place by Impetus / Information received by the
Five organs of perception VISION by Eyes, SOUND by Ears, SMELL by Nose TASTE by the Tongue and TOUCH by Skin.
All information is first received by the Mind which immediately gives the
command to the organs of Action. The Mind thus plays an important role
In the function of the body.
Process of information: When information is received by any one of the five organs of perception it goes into the chamber of PERCEPTION from where it is
Immediately transferred to the chamber of RECOGNITION where it compares the data with memory of the immense storehouse of the past. After recognizing
it goes into the chamber of EVALUATION for judgement. Finally into the chamber of ACTION.

BODY
GOOD HEALTH can be maintained by the co-ordination of a RE-ACTION FREE mind. Which is difficult but possible with the help of nature’s law of CAUSE & EFFECT . The habit pattern of the mind is enslaved between LIKE & DISLIKE, PLEASANT & UNPLEASANT, ( Priya / Apriya ) which scriptural term is Raag/Dwesha.
All the five organs of perception are continually reacting to either like or dislike, the habit pattern has to be changed.
Every reaction by the mind is a un-natural state of unhealthy body function which produces toxins and gets assimilated into the blood stream. With gradual
build up of toxins into the system the natural immune mechanism starts weakening down. The result of which malfunction of the vital organs of the
body starts manifesting.

The root cause of the problem lies in the deeper part of the mind, where the roots of negativity are flourishing and are directly connected to the chamber of
the mind, where they have a strong influence and their existence dependent
on reactions.

REMEDY - Eradicate the roots of negativity by depriving them of the feed, with the Help of natures law of CAUSE & EFFECT – remove the cause and there can be no effect.

MAY ALL OF YOU BE HAPPY-HAPPY-HAPPY

(Writer and presentor is a positive thinker, and humorist.)
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